Your BS Detector Is a Skill

I got lied to a lot when I started.

Took me years to realize that's just what happens when you're young, have money to spend, and can't tell the difference between confidence and competence.

My BS detector needed training. The only way to train it was getting burned.

The Education

When networking was still a thing in my world, I'd go to events and meet people.

Everyone looked impressive. Everyone had something to say. I had mentors who'd guide me. I believed everything they said.

I didn't understand that people have a public side and a private side. I didn't know you shouldn't believe the public side.

Here's a partial list of what taught me, roughly in order of how much it cost:

A former team member who lied about their startup experience and previous accomplishments to get hired. Annoying. Wasted time. Moved on.

People who lied about being angel investors or VCs—just to waste my time and feel important. Founders who lie so excessively about their accomplishments that you feel like throwing up listening to them. More time wasted. Started to notice patterns.

A sales agency who promised results, took my money, then ghosted me for two months. An SEO agency who promised results, couldn't deliver after twelve months of payments. Now it's costing real money.

Someone who inflated their living expenses and manufactured a personal crisis to steal money from the company. Just typing this, I can feel the exhaustion I felt years ago. That one hurt.

Customers who turned out to be competitors pretending to be customers, extracting intel about our company. That one was dangerous.

A mentor who told me in private it's okay to ignore a court order when you feel like it's right. That could have been catastrophic if I'd listened.

This is maybe 1/10 of what I could list. It's painful to write.

But this is what building a business is actually like—especially starting young. I started in university. Pure and simple-hearted. That's what campus life trains you to be.

In business, that's a liability.

What the BS Detector Actually Is

It's not a superpower. It's pattern recognition built from scar tissue.

Now when someone makes a claim, I can usually tell if it's BS—even if I don't know the industry, don't have data, don't have proof. Common logic plus experience of getting burned is enough.

I'm not cynical. I'm calibrated.

The difference matters. Cynical people assume everyone is lying and miss real opportunities. Calibrated people default to skepticism and require proof before believing. They still engage—they just verify first.

The Red Flags I Now See Instantly

After years of this, certain patterns jump out immediately:

Over-credentialing without specifics.

"I've worked with tons of startups" but can't name three.

"We've generated millions in revenue for clients" but no case studies, no references.

Vague references to important people.

"My investors" without names. "I know people at [company]" but it's never clear who or how.

Emotional urgency before proof.

They need you to decide now. They need the money now. They need commitment before you've verified anything. U

rgency is often manufactured to prevent you from thinking.

Resistance to putting things in writing.

"We don't need a contract, we trust each other." Anyone who resists written agreements is telling you something.

Claims that can't be verified in five minutes.

If someone says they did something impressive, you can usually check. If you can't find anything, ask yourself why.

"Trust me" as a response to reasonable questions.

Trust is earned through answers, not demanded in place of them.

These aren't foolproof. But when I see two or three of these together, I'm already halfway out the door.

Why This Matters

Once you have this skill, everything gets easier.

You can say no faster. You know who's worth your time and who isn't.

You can tell in the first conversation who you can work with long-term and who's going to be a problem.

You stop appeasing people. You stop taking meetings out of politeness. You stop giving the benefit of the doubt to people who haven't earned it.

Last year I was going to partner with someone on a project. Three red flags in the first two calls—vague credentials, resistance to specifics in the agreement, urgency to close before I'd done proper diligence.

I added protections to the contract. They pushed back. I held firm.

Six months later, mutual contacts told me what happened with their other partners.

The protections I insisted on would have saved me a lot of money and a legal headache if things had gone the direction they went for others.

My BS detector worked. I didn't get hurt. That's what matters.

How to Build It

There's no shortcut. You have to work with a lot of people. You have to get burned a few times.

But you can accelerate it:

Default to skepticism.

When someone makes a claim, your first instinct should be: this is probably not true. Then look for evidence that it is. If the evidence is there, great. If it's not, you saved yourself.

Watch what people do, not what they say.

Words are free. Actions cost something. Track record matters more than promises. If they say they've done it before, find the people they did it with.

Read the contract.

Every time. Even with people you like. Especially with people you like. The contract is where you find out what they actually expect versus what they said in the meeting.

Think about the downside.

Every partnership is an opportunity. It's also a risk. What happens if this person turns out to be different than they present? Are you protected?

This might sound paranoid. We live in a high-trust society, and that's generally good.

But entrepreneurship is different. You can't believe everyone. You have to protect yourself—maybe not first, but importantly.

The Point

If you're early in your journey, everyone will look impressive. Everyone will have something to say. Mentors will guide you. Investors will promise things. Agencies will guarantee results. Partners will seem aligned.

Some of them are real. Many of them are not.

Use your brain. Default to thinking it's BS. Then look for proof that it's not.

You'll learn this eventually. The question is whether you learn it from getting burned or from paying attention to people who already did.

Either way, you're paying tuition. One just costs more.